सर्वर के सभी जश्न मनाते हैं, मैं 37 मिनट चुपचाप रोया — एक खिलाड़ी की सनक

कोई 警告 नहीं।एक पल, स्क्रीन पर आगबुर्रे और विजय के गुणगान;अगले पल? मेरे हाथ कांपने।आवाज़ मुझ tak पहुँची।

मैं -मुझे-एकछटपड़वय-में-अकेला-बैठा-था—दूसरों-को-देखता-था,जबकि-उनकी-खुशी- इसमें-‘मुझसे’खुशफहमि-

यह हार -जब–थी।

to—अभाव–

*आप ‘टू सेसिटिव’ होने पर -टॉड–इध्र–एचड—आप-

‘अधिक सचेत’ होने का बोझ

एक समुदायविद्–जो–खिलाड़ियों–पर–अध्ययन–करता–था—मुझे—आँकड़ে –इतन:89%खिलड़िओ –खुशहद –अध्ययण –उठत/घटत/आई

correlation –mehmāna —bhi nahi hua.

उस 夜 Furen Festival —जहাঁ -हर -जीत -फलगण -और -एकसमय -आवаз–बढ़त — mujhe khel na karna tha — bas dekhna tha.

Maine dekha ki log energi ke saath lehre rahe: jab dusro ne hasa to main bhi muskura raha, jab dusro ne jhooma to main bhi aage badh raha.

Par maine ruk diya.

to na dar se — balki pahchane se: Yeh sirf khel nahi hai — yeh bhavna ki chhor hai.

Aur main uss dance me shamil nahi ho saka.

Khel mein Chuppana Kyu Chuna?

Humse kehte hain ‘bas maza lo’. Lekin agar tumhara mazaa sunta hona chahta hai? mere maata ne kaha tha: “Ek chupchaap dimag zyada dekh sakta hai.” bharat ke street aur chinshi calligraphy ke beech pirojana sikha mujhe ki gehrai sabda se nahi hoti. lakin online jagah performance maangti hai—even happiness ka script:

• jeetne par smile (agar feel na ho)

• doosron ke jeetne par cheer (agar gham ho)

• prasent rehna (jab invisible ho)

Irony? Jitni zyada empathy hum mein hoti hai—utni hi mushkil lagti hai fit hone me.

> *Tum 'too sensitive' nahin ho — tum bas alag frequency pe tune hue ho.*

## Apne khel ko swarup dene ka anand – Performance Nahin – Self-witnessing 

Sahbhagita ka matlab yeh nahi ki tum apni khushi perform karo. Kabhi kabhi khel sabse sachi tab hota hai jab woh private rakha jata hai.

Mai har session journal karne laga—not to track wins but to honor moments like these:

• Jab meri character fireworks me statik thi kyunki woh too zyada real life jaise laga.

• Jab mai game rok diya kyunki kisi ne kaha "humne kar liya!" aur ekdum yaad aaya ki kitni der baad koi mujhe personal taur par kuch bola tha.

• Chuppa samajh jo kabhi haar feel better lagti thi than pretending to win with strangers who don't know my name—or my silence.

Sachai? Yeh fault nahi hain—they signals hain. Signals jo kehte hain: *Tumhe space chahiye. Tumhe softness chahiye.* Aur unki care bhi chahiye—in games as much as anywhere else.

Platform unity promote karti hai spectacle se—but healing shuru hota hai jab tum apne aap ko unseen rehne ka haq denge bina shame ke.

Aakhri rule hona chaiye: **Apna tarika khelo**—unke na ki tumhari.